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Self Control

Self control is the ability to keep one’s disruptive emotions in check. You have good self control if you are able to restrain negative actions when provoked, when faced with opposition or hostility from others, or when working under pressure.  


Extreme displays of negative emotion have never emerged as a driver of good leadership. While you cannot control the biological impulses that drive your emotions, you can certainly manage them, or even channel them for good purposes. People with self control know how to deal calmly with stress and stay positive and poised even in trying moments. This trait helps them create an environment of trust and fairness: politics and infighting are replaced with productivity. This makes it easier to attract, hire and retain talented employees, making an organization more competitive and stable. Self control also trickles-down throughout the organization, making bad moods less frequent.


Self control also promotes integrity because many people who take unethical actions often do so because of their inability to manage their emotions. It often happen so that an opportunity to exaggerate profits, increase an expense account or abuse power in some other ways presents itself to people with inability to control their impulses and who are unable to say “no.”


Developing Self Control

·       Create a list of your triggers, of what causes you to lose your emotional control. Next, try to identify the feelings that each trigger evokes and learn how to recognize them. Next time you feel that way, try to catch yourself and say to yourself: “I’m feeling irritated,” or “I’m feeling impatient,” or “I’m feeling threatened”  

·       Focus on each of the negative feelings at a time and learn to address each one of them in the most effective way  

·       Develop a thinking process that works for you, where you remind yourself that suspending your judgment and thinking before acting is the key. Most of the time in a work environment it is okay to take a moment before providing an answer or taking an action. Take advantage of that and don’t get caught up in emotion

·       Take a stress test and burnout test. Determine how well you are tolerating pressure of work or home right now and how close you are to being fully burned out. Focus on reducing your stress through physical exercise, yoga, meditation, massage and other relaxation techniques. You can also go on walks, do gardening, take baths, or just read a relaxing book



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